Thursday, November 20, 2008

Thanksgiving Jokes

While you're amazing the Thanksgiving dinner guest with the amazing Thanksgiving facts from my last post I'm giving you the opportunity to throw in some Turkey Day humor, which I listed below. Remember people, in comedy it's all about timing!

What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient child?
If your father could see you now he would turn over in his gravy!

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
Pilgrims!

Should you have the whole famile for Thanksgiving dinner?
No, you should just have the turkey!

What sound does a turkey's phone make?
wing, wing.

When does Christmas come before Thanksgiving?
In the dictionary.

If the Pilgrims were alive today what would they be most famous for?
Their AGE!

What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to?
Plymouth Rock!

How much did the Mayflower weigh?
A Puri-TON!

What's a turkey's favorite song?
"I'm Dreaming Of A White Christmas".

Why can't you take a turkey to church?
Because it always uses FOWL language!

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes, a building can't jump at all.

Why was Plymouth Rock so brave?
Because it was a little boulder!

What are unhappy cranberries called?
Blueberries!

Why didn't the turkey eat dessert?
It was stuffed.

Which side of a turkey has the most feathers?
The outside.

Why did they let the turkey join the band?
Because it had the drumsticks.

Why did the police arrest the turkey?
Because they suspected it of fowl play.

What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?
A tur-KEY.

What is a turkey's favorite black tie-celebration?
The butterball.

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